Out of the Darkness by Marion Crook

Author:Marion Crook [Crook, Marion]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: SOC047000
Publisher: Arsenal Pulp Press
Published: 2003-04-01T05:00:00+00:00

HOW TEENS CAN HELP THEMSELVES

I would hold your hand in the stormy skies

I would cradle your head in a hurricane of madness

I would wipe your brow and face the fire

and I would not relent, I would not relent.

–B.B.

When the teens were in pain - when suicide appeared as the only escape route—they often did not have the energy nor the ability to make big corrective changes in their lives; they were not able to clearly see what they needed. If a white knight had arrived on a horse and invited them to ride off with him, they would have escaped with him in a flash, but white knights were in short supply and, as so many of them accurately saw, they were usually alone to deal with their problems themselves. Nothing in the real world looked worthwhile. When they were in pain, every path looked too hard to take, every option too difficult to try. If they had advice to give at that time it would have been: don't try to make grand changes, but small ones, until the pain begins to subside.

It may be difficult to move from being withdrawn and silent to being open and forthcoming about one's problems, but the first step might be to seek out someone to talk to. Most couldn't talk to their parents, but some did have a favourite relative. Suzanne sometimes talked to her brother and Mike to his sister. Anna talked to her teacher, but only briefly and not intimately. According to most, there doesn't seem to be enough time in school schedules to develop the kind of relationship with a teacher that would make it possible to confide in him or her.

Suicide remains a taboo subject, one of those social unmentionables that is not discussed very often. Some of the teens felt even talking about suicide was "wrong," a shameful idea, and didn't want to admit even to thinking about it. They thought that anyone they confided in would either tell them they were crazy or that they were wrong to think about it rather than try to understand their feelings. If they did feel they could talk to someone about it, it was usually a friend.

But picking the right friend can be tricky. Two of the teens I interviewed told me that they had talked to people who were also suicidal and that they had no energy to help. They needed to talk to someone who was sensible and "together," and who would take them seriously. But some people feel uncomfortable talking about suicide and don't want to hear about it. They aren't used to intimacy, may feel threatened by other people's revelations, and won't listen when a teen approaches for help.

It is often necessary for teens to have several friends to try talking to. If the friends won't listen, the teen needs to be prepared to feel rejected, foolish, and even more worthless than before. It may be difficult to try talking to someone else, but it is necessary.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.